Come In, Hit And Get Out

12-03-2008

George: So then, as we were leaving, we were just kind of standing there,
and she was sort of smiling at me, and I wasn't sure if she wanted me to ask her
out, because when women smile at me I don't know what it means. Sometimes I
interpret it like they're Psychotic or something and I don't know if I'm
supposed to smile back, I don't know what to do. So I just stood there like -
remember how Quayle looked when Benson gave him that Kennedy line? - that's what
I looked like.

Jerry: So you didn't ask?

George: No, I froze.

Jerry: (Points to counter) Counter.

George: Oh yeah. So wait, wait. A half-hour later I'm back in the office,
I tell Lloyd the whole story. He says "So why don't you call her". I says "I
can't." I couldn't, I couldn't do it right then. For me to ask a woman out I
gotta get into a mental state like the karate guys before they break the bricks.
So Lloyd calls me a wuss.

Jerry: He said wuss?

George: Yeah. Anyway, he shamed me into it.

Jerry: So you called. (They sit at counter)

George: Right. And, and to cover my nervousness I started eating an apple,
because I think if they hear you chewing on the other end of the phone, it
makes you sound casual.

Jerry: Yeah, like a farm boy.

George: Right. So I call her up, I tell her it's me, she gives me an
enthusiastic 'Hi!'

Jerry: Wow. Enthusiastic 'Hi!', that's beautiful.

George: Oh, if I don't get the enthusiastic 'Hi!', I'm outta there.

Jerry: Alright, so you're chewing your apple, you got your enthusiastic
'Hi!' Go ahead.

George: So, we're talking, and I don't like to go too long before I ask them
out, I wanna get it over with right away, so I just blurt out "What are you
doing Saturday night?"

Jerry: And?

George: She bought.

Jerry: Great day in the morning.

George: Then I got off the phone right away.

Jerry: Sure, it's like robbing a bank: you don't loiter around in front of
the teller holding that big bag of money. You come in, you hit and get out.

Seinfeld