The Truth

17-08-2008


JERRY: Yeah
GEORGE: George
JERRY: Come up - Ah, there he is, the man himself, George Louis Costanza. Here I am about to go
to the electric chair and my oldest friend is dating the governor
GEORGE: My whole life has been a complete waste of time,
JERRY: And there's so much more to go.
GEORGE: Now I know what I am supposed to do. It's so simple. Tell the truth That's all. Just tell the truth
JERRY: So what happened? You gave her my tax papers? ... My papers?
GEORGE: Oh, oh, your papers
JERRY: What happened you didn't give her the papers?
GEORGE: No. I did.
JERRY: SO?
GEORGE: ...I broke up with her.

JERRY: You what?
GEORGE: I broke up with her.
JERRY: I'm being audited! And you broke up with her?
GEORGE: It's OK. It's fine. She'll do it. I'm sure she'll still do it.
JERRY: Why will she still do it? She hates you now. People don't do you favors after you dump
them.
GEORGE: Oh, no. We left on good terms.
JERRY: How is that possible?
GEORGE: Because I uh, I told her the truth.
JERRY: Oh, my God.
GEORGE: It's OK.
JERRY: It's unheard of ...
GEORGE: She asked me to.
JERRY: So you lie! What did you tell her?
GEORGE: I told her that she was pretentious.
JERRY: Pretentious!? The woman has my tax papers. You told her she was pretentious? The IRS. They're like the MAFIA. They can take anything they want!
ELAINE: How would you like it if someone told YOU the truth?
GEORGE: Like what? What could they say?
ELAINE: There are plenty of things to say.
GEORGE: Like what? I'm bald? What is it specifically? Is, is there an odor I'm not aware of?
ELAINE: George, please.
GEORGE: Give me one.
ELAINE: You sure?
GEORGE: Yes.
ELAINE: What?
ELAINE: Forget it. You are very careful with money.
GEORGE: I'm cheap? You think I'm CHEAP? How could you say that to me? I can't believe this. How could you say that to me?
ELAINE: You asked me to.
GEORGE: You should have lied.
ELAINE: HUH, so should you.
JERRY: OK, wait a second, wait a second, what happened to my papers?
GEORGE: I mean I'm not really working right now.
ELAINE: I know.
GEORGE: When I was working I spent baby.
JERRY: Yeah, I know champagne, limos, cigars. WHAT happened to the papers?
GEORGE: She put them in her pocketbook. I guess she took them with her.
ELAINE: Pocketbook or a handbag?
JERRY: Is that relevant? She TOOK them. Call her office.
GEORGE: Give me the phone. Yea, Hi I would like to speak to Patrice. ...
what? ... oh really? ... oh, ok, thank you, ...
JERRY: What? What?
GEORGE: She never came back from lunch.
JERRY: This is no good. This is no good. Call her house.
GEORGE: Hi, are you OK? no, no,.. huh, She hung up.
JERRY: Not good.
GEORGE: All right. There's nothing to be worried about. She's just a little
annoyed right now. Tomorrow I'll personally go over there. I'll apologize.
I'll get the papers. Don't worry. Don't worry.
JERRY: Not good

Seinfeld