Yeah, Right

18-01-2010

Jerry: Look at my hands. Look. Filthy from the paper. You know, they should give you a Wet-nap when you buy one, like at those rib joints.
Elaine: So what'd you do last night?
Jerry: Went out with George, you?
Elaine: Went out with Cynthia.
Jerry: How was it? What'd you talk about?
Elaine: Well, you know, the usual; The Federal Reserve, the rainforest. Cynthia thought we should nuke the rainforest, you know, get rid of it in one fell swoop so we can at least eliminate it as a subject of conversation. What about you?
Jerry: We brushed on that. Actually, George was in rare form. He just can't find anybody.
Elaine: I know, Cynthia too. She's really given up.
Jerry: George too.

They look at each other for a moment.

Jerry and Elaine (together): Yeah, right.
Jerry: I've never fixed anybody up.
Elaine: Uh, me neither and I am not about to start with George.
Jerry: Well why wouldn't you start with George? You think she's too good for George?
Elaine: I didn't say 'too good', did I say 'too good'?
Jerry: Well you implied it.
Elaine: I didn't say it.
Jerry: Because if you think she's too good for George, you are dead wrong. Dead wrong. Who is she?
Elaine: Who is he?
Jerry: He's George!
Elaine: She's Cynthia!
Jerry: So what?
Elaine: What, you don't think she's beautiful?
Jerry: I don't know, what's with the eyebrows?
Elaine: You know what your problem is? Your standards are too high.
Jerry: I went out with you.
Elaine: That's because my standards are too low. And by the way, you know, women kill for eyebrows like that. Do you know that? I mean women pluck their real eyebrows out of their head, one by one, until they're bald, Jerry. Bald above the eyes! And then they paint in these eyebrows to look like that.
Jerry: Well let me tell you something about George. He is fast. He can run like the wind. And he's strong. I've seen him lift a hundred pounds over his head without even knowing it. And you wouldn't know it to look at him, but George can bait a hook.
Elaine: He can really do that?
Jerry: Come on, let's do it, I think they'll really get along.
Elaine: What, are you into this?
Jerry: Yeah, come on, it's a good match.
Elaine: No, wait a minute, wait a minute. They're gonna be telling us how their dates went. Are we gonna share that information?
Jerry: Naturally.
Elaine: Well, wait a minute, we're gonna tell each other everything, I mean every secret?
Jerry: Everything.
Elaine: What if it worked out?
Jerry (dialing): Yeah right.

Seinfeld