The Collar's Ok

05-02-2008

GEORGE: (Sarcastic) Maybe for her new performance piece she'll give birth on stage.

ELAINE: She stopped performing.

GEORGE: (Again, sarcastic) Oh, what a huge blow to the culture.

JERRY: (Gesturing to George) You believe this guy? He holds a grudge like Khomeini.

GEORGE: She dragged me down to that warehouse on the waterfront in Brooklin to see one of her "performances".

JERRY: Oh, and she cooks dinner onstage for some celebrity?

GEORGE: God! She's cooking dinner for God! She's yelling and screaming, and the next thing I know, she throws a big can of chocolate syrup all over my new red shirt.

ELAINE: It was an accident!

GEORGE: Oh, yeah, sure, accident, right. She was aiming right at me like she was putting out a fire! Then, for the rest of the show, I'm sitting there with chocolate all over my shirt. Flies are landing on me. I'm boiling - I'm fantasizing all the things I'm gonna say when I see her. And later, finally, backstage when I talk to her, I'm a groveling worm. "What kind of chocolate was that? Do you throw any other foods?"

JERRY: (To Elaine) he thought he still had a shot.

GEORGE: And then, then, then she leaves with somebody else! Never even, never even said goodbye! Never called me back.. Never apologized. Nothing. Like I was dirt.

JERRY: What ever happened with the shirt?

GEORGE: I still have it. The collar's okay. I wear it under sweaters.

Seinfeld