New scene. Jerry's apartment, the next day. Jerry is now giving his spare keys to Elaine.
JERRY: So put 'em in a safe place.
ELAINE: I will.
JERRY: Where?
ELAINE: I don't know. I'll hide 'em. So, is Kramer upset?
JERRY: I think so. I mean, he's acting really weird lately...he's different.
ELAINE: Well, maybe you should just give him the keys back.
JERRY: I can't.
ELAINE (mouths the words): Is that Kramer?
JERRY: Who's there?
KRAMER (in hallway): Uh, Kramer.
ELAINE: Oh, I'm not, uh...
KRAMER: No, no, no, it's o.k. I don't care about the keys. It's my fault. I gave the keys away with my stupidity. I broke "the covenant of the keys."
ELAINE: Jerry, give him the keys back.
JERRY: Elaine...
KRAMER: I don't want the keys back! No, I'm glad the way things turned out. I was clingin' to those keys, man! Like a branch on the banks of a raging river. And now I have let go. And I'm free...to go with the current. To float. (To Jerry) And I thank you.
JERRY: Take the keys.
KRAMER: I don't want the keys!
JERRY: O.K.!
KRAMER: Now, one more thing - I would like my keys back.
JERRY: Your spare set?
KRAMER: That's right.
JERRY: You want 'em back?
KRAMER: Yeah. Yeah, I think it would be for the best.
New scene at the coffee shop. Kramer is now giving the huge keyring to George.
GEORGE: Gee, Kramer, I uh...I don't know what to say.
KRAMER: Say yes! Yes, George. Yes!
GEORGE: Should I give you my keys, is that the transaction, trading keys...? Because Elaine has my keys.
KRAMER: Well, you can get 'em back.
GEORGE: I suppose I could.
KRAMER: Because you see, George, having the keys to Jerry's apartment? That kept me in a fantasy world. Every time I went over to his house, it was like I was on vacation. Better food, better view, better TV. And cleaner? Oh - much cleaner. That became my reality. I ignored the squalor in my own life because I'm looking at life, you see, through Jerry's eyes. I was living in twilight, George. Living in the shadows. Living in the darkness...like you.
GEORGE: Me?
KRAMER: Oh, yeah. I can barely see you, George.
GEORGE: Alright, stop it Kramer, you're freakin' me out.
WAITRESS: Hi, are you ready to order?
KRAMER (moves over and sits next to George): Do you ever yearn?
GEORGE: Yearn? Do I yearn?
KRAMER: I yearn.
GEORGE: You yearn.
KRAMER: Oh, yes. Yes, I yearn. Often, I...I sit...and yearn. Have you yearned?
GEORGE: Well, not recently. I craved. I crave all the time, constant craving...but I haven't yearned.
KRAMER (in disgust): Look at you.
GEORGE: Aw, Kramer, don't start...
KRAMER (moving back to the other side of the booth): You're wasting your life.
GEORGE: I am not! What you call wasting, I call living! I'm living my life!
KRAMER: O.K., like what? No, tell me! Do you have a job?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: You got money?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have a woman?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have any prospects?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: You got anything on the horizon?
GEORGE: Uh...no.
KRAMER: Do you have any action at all?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?
GEORGE: I like to get the Daily News!
KRAMER: George, it's time for us to grow up - and be men. Not little boys.
GEORGE: Why?
KRAMER: I'm goin' to California. You know, I got the bug.
GEORGE: Yeah, I think I got a touch of something, too.
KRAMER: No, the acting bug. Ever since I was in that Woody Allen movie.
GEORGE: "These pretzels are making me thirsty"? That was one line! You got fired!
KRAMER: I know, I know, but man! I never felt so alive! Now, are you coming with me?
GEORGE: Uh, no, I'm not.
KRAMER: Alright, suit yourself. But let's keep this between us - we're key brothers now.
GEORGE: You're not really gonna go to California, are you?
KRAMER (points to his head): Up here, I'm already gone.
Seinfeld
No comments:
Post a Comment