Phony

23-05-2010

Kramer: Oh hey, you know I invited Mike Moffit. You don't mind, do you?
Jerry: No, I like Mike.
Kramer: Yeah, I just got off the phone with him, you know we had a great conversation.
Jerry: Oh yeah? What did you talk about?
Kramer: Well actually we talked about you. Yeah. He had some pretty interesting things to say.
Jerry: Oh yeah? What did he say?
Kramer: You have to know everything, don't you?
Jerry: No, come on, Kramer. What did he say?
Kramer: Why is that? Why do you have to know everything?
Jerry: Kramer, just tell me what the guy said.
Kramer: Beg me.
Jerry: Please, don't make me beg.
Kramer: No no no, I want you to beg me. And I don't want you to say it, I just want you to put some beg into it. Go on.
Jerry: Kramer, please tell me what the guy said.
Kramer: No no no, that's no good. No, I really don't think that's a beg. No, it's close, but uh...
Jerry: Kramer!
Kramer: Look, I can't say anything. You know, the guy told me the stuff in confidence, I'd be betraying a friend.
Jerry: Well you can't just mention it and then not tell me.
Kramer: Alright. I'll tell you but you can't say anything to him.
Jerry: I'm not saying anything, I'm putting it in the vault, I'm locking the vault, it's a vault!
Kramer: He thinks you're a phony.
Jerry: He what?
Kramer: I told you, he thinks you're a phony.
Jerry: A phony? He called me a phony?
Kramer: A big phony. A big one.
Jerry: Why did you tell me that if I can't say anything?!
Kramer: You begged me.

Seinfeld